Don't Be A Loser: My Take on 'The Biggest Loser'

What’s my take on NBC’s ‘The Biggest Loser’? The TV show that on day one, throws out-of-shape, obese contestants on a treadmill and sets the speed to 6.0? The show that requires 300+lb. individuals to do box jumps for 5 hours straight? The show that with each new season, makes the network millions of dollars off the backs of overweight participants trying their best not to humiliate themselves? What do I think of The Biggest Loser? 

It’s great. 

It changes lives.

This opinion doesn't align with many fitness professionals that argue the show is “Too dangerous” and “Unrealistic” and “Not the way I would train someone in that shape”.

Even if you or I wouldn’t train the severely overweight the way they are trained on the show, it is not our place to question it or say the coaches are doing it wrong. Everyone gets to the top of the hill in their own way. Many times it’s different from your way.

Too many people are quick to say that there’s no way contestants will be able to sustain the type of exercise and diet regimen that is prescribed on the show once they leave. The good news is that the burden is on them, not you, to sustain it. Either they will and continue healthier living; or they won’t and they’ll get fat again. And either way, you will still live the same. 

Kim Kardashian was not the first to break the internet. A few seasons back, one participant came out for her final weigh-in looking like this….

Social Media was littered with posts claiming how unhealthy it was for her to lose that much weight. Shut up. If you lost over 150lbs. you would be ecstatic! I’d guess her to be healthier on the right than she is on the left, even if she does suffer from an eating disorder you assume her to have.

At this point I’ll give in and admit that I disagree with things I see taking place on the show. My problem is in the immense amount of hate toward the show. Every season, contestants’ lives are changed for the better. Every season, thousands of viewers are inspired from home. The show promotes exercising and living healthier. This is what makes The Biggest Loser great overall. 

Don’t be a loser. Don’t hate on The Biggest Loser. Besides, It’s looking like I'm going to have to send my cat there pretty soon.

5 Types of People You'll Find in the Gym and on the Road

At the gym and on the road. Both of these popular locations can contain irritating people. Here are 5 types of people I have encountered at the gym, and their on-road equivalents. 

#1

Gym User: Person blocking the drinking fountain by reading the above fountain sign after they get a drink.

Road User: Person in front of you that won’t go right on red.

In both cases, the person not paying attention in front of you is holding you back from getting where you gotta go.

#2

Gym User: Person that is afraid to use anything other than machines.

Road User: Person that never exceeds 20mph in the snow

Being overly cautious can cause you to lose your gainz, and can create an accident, respectively.

#3

Gym User: Person spending an inordinate amount of time talking to the front desk attendant.

Road User: Person who texts while driving.

This person may only be trying to earn a new friend, or to appear as being cool and popular, but is actually annoying and should pick a better time to chat.

#4

Gym User: Person that sets up, begins working out, and crowds your area.

Road User: Cyclist on the road.

There are better places to work out, and to ride a bike, respectively. And quit running through stop signs.

#5

Gym User: Unsolicited advice giver. 

Road User: Person who pulls out in front of you, then travels 10mph slower than you want to go. 

Even if your advice is helpful, I didn't ask for your input. It’s almost as unimpressive as you cutting me off.

Saturday Night Binge

Only two things have kept me off Netflix this afternoon - the Patriots’ game, and the writing of this blog post. Over the last eight hours, I have done little more than get pissed off, watching ‘Making a Murderer’. If you aren't engrossed along with me, my guess is you have either…

1. already watched it
2. decided you will watch it soon
3. done the same with a different TV series

Viewing in bulk presents the following problems - you don’t get a damn thing done, your legs fall asleep from too much sitting, and you begin to incorrectly identify yourself as an expert in the subject matter. Of course, the convenience of getting to finish each episode commercial-free, and the immediately available next episode, obviously eclipse the aforementioned problems. The ultimate effect is that you are a satisfied viewer.

Unlike binge watching, binge exercising lacks positive effects. If you work out for ten days in a row, then proceed to skip the gym for the next ten, you won’t see progress. Yo-yo exercising is close to as ineffective (for health benefits) as not exercising at all. You've lost 12 pounds over the last 15 days - and that’s great. But if you fail to continue your efforts, you will certainly re-gain those 12, plus more.

In order to reap the benefits of working out, one must adhere to a long term plan. Consistency is the most important factor.

Steven Avery spent 18 years in prison as an innocent man. You can manage bettering your health with consistent exercise for a year. 

Matador

While at the refrigerator each morning and night, I am charged by 2 angry horned beasts. Out-numbered and without a red flag, my only protection is the red solo cup I intend to fill with water. The sound of the ice dispenser kicking on is their signal to begin the bum rush. Within seconds, the cats skate to my feet wanting a piece of the pie. I push the lever to release the prize. Once the avalanche of ice cascades to the floor, they kick the cubes across the kitchen to underneath the table. The legs of the dining room furniture create a life-sized pinball machine. After a minute of swatting, the game is over and won when they begin licking the half melted ice cubes. 

I heard (somewhere) that ice is bad for cats. I don't know whether or not this is actually true, but if it is, don’t be upset with me. Refer to my profile and remember that my posts are based on experience and not science. My experience is that these cats enjoy getting their ice.

I am not going to over analyze whether or not I should give them a cold one. That is a waste of time. Over analyzing saps happiness and leads to un-productivity. 

Are you guilty of over analyzing your decisions? 

If you're browsing on nike.com and you can't stop clicking back to the newest Nike Free’s, ignore the $150 price tag and click “buy”. Otherwise you’ll be back online to buy them next week anyway.

If it’s only Tuesday, the second day of your new diet, and the only way you see yourself getting through the day is by hitting the Pizza Ranch buffet at 6:30pm, then go. Otherwise you’ll find yourself waiting in line for cheese sticks Wednesday night.

If you enjoy a double shot of black-market Jack3d to power your training sessions, go ahead and have 3 scoops. Otherwise you’ll have a s****y workout.

If you can’t go to sleep without watching TV, watch it. Otherwise you’ll still be awake at 1am, pissed off, and decide to turn on Bravo anyway.

If you're considering buying $100 worth of tickets for the $1.3 billion winning jackpot, buy them. Even though you won’t win, imagine the excitement the wishful thinking will provide.

Is the price really worth it? 

Should I really sabotage my diet? 

Should I cut back on my caffeine intake? 

Should I watch less TV at night? 

How likely am I to ever win the Lottery? 

While these are responsible questions to ask, the correct answer is usually not the one you want to hear. But going with the answer you do want to hear won’t kill you, and what it will do is satisfy an urge. You can deal with the (not so horrible) repercussions later. Spend less time analyzing what you should do and do what you want to do instead. You'll be happier.

Should I quit giving my sharp-eared cats ice? Hell no. They like it.

Don't Kill the Host

I woke up at 5:45am this morning to the sound of crying babies. I un-glued myself from the mattress, slowly struggled myself to a stand, and with an outstretched arm was able to locate the nearest structure. The cries continued but became more distant as I slid along the wall. The noises were leading me out of the bedroom. I continued to follow through the door and around the corner. My knees were too stiff to do anything more than Penguin-waddle down the stairs. When I reached the bottom, the sounds guided me across the living room. My feet slugged behind me, matting down the very carpet I slid them through. My eyes began to crack open only after my bare feet hit the frosty kitchen tile floor, but what officially woke me was the violent retreat of my hand away from the light switch, after the first shock of the day. As the darkness withered away and my vision became less blurry, I was able to focus in on the source of the whining. At my feet sat 2 cats - one Panther, one Lion. They were hungry and needed fed. This is when I began drawing the comparison between our beloved pets and the very bodies we live inside.

Though my cats aren’t the typical “babies” that first come to mind, they depend on me the same way a newborn human would - 100%.

If it weren't for me feeding them, they would eventually starve to death.

If one of them got sick and I neglected taking them to the vet, eventually their illness would kill them. 

If I didn’t step in each time the over-grown Panther was mauling the Lion Cub, Simba might get eaten.

The kitties cannot survive on their own. They depend on me in the same way the host human body depends on the human tenant.

A pancreas cannot stop a person from drinking a 2 liter of soda, yet it will be overworked if the person sips it.

A pair of lungs cannot stop a person from smoking a cigarette, yet toxins will coat their insides if the person puffs it.

A heart cannot force a person to get to the gym, yet it will become weaker if the person continues to avoid it.

You play the biggest role in the longevity of both your pets and your body. With improper care, all subjects could be gone sooner than expected. I encourage us all to make better decisions and develop better habits that ultimately determine our health and well being.